Monday, August 10, 2009
KARROT TALKS ABOUT STEROID USE
Vanderbilt University , BVD Bloggingtographer - While taking a break behind Branscomb , BVD caught up with Karrot Top , during his summer visit to Vanderbilt , to talk with him about his suspected steroid use.
" Yep , it's true , I'm on steroids. " answered K T.
When asked how this came about he replied , " Well , you know , how things used to be , the chicks , they kept hitting me in the face with telephones. So , I got tired of it one day after loosing another tooth and looking in the mirror , I saw my pathetic 88 pound body frame. Soo , I went over to the Vanderbilt Sports Club , you know , the one above the garage where all the sales are sanctioned and I asked around and like , the next thing you know , I'm on Vanderbilt private jet headed for an abandoned Air Force missile silo in Wisconsin. "
" Then , like I was blindfolded and taken to this elevator and went like a 100 stories under ground where I met this guy in a Halloween mask and he takes me to this closet and hands me a bat , see ? " Karrot continued , " Well , this bat is hollow see , take off the top and it's loaded with steroids , then , he gives me a really big suitcase , and , I asked what it was for and he says to open it , so , I do , and , there's all these plastic bags full of little pills. This guy says these are the bat refills. He also said with this bat being metal , I can pass through any airport undetected. So , when I'm on stage doing my routine , I'll play like I'm taking drugs when in fact I really am. So , what do you think ? " Karrot asked showing off his massive 27 inch bicep.
" Wow , now that's some muscle. " BVD responded. " Are the girls still throwing phones in your face ? "
" No , one of the benefits of these steroids is my member has grown ass big ass a crock , just like the ones back home . The girls see this animal sneaking up see , and when they see the whites of it's eyes , they run. "
" Do you have any distribution problems ?"
" Aaaww , not really , you see , I'm loaded so that puts me on Vandy's triple A list ."
