Thursday, November 29, 2007

 

The Plight of America's Veterans

The United States - today's Veterans are getting attacked from all angles these days , whether it be from a terrorist or from their own politicians. Now , it's their own boss , aka , The Pentagon , attacking them. Ya see , those admirals and generals love to party. They also love to spend money , ass long ass it aint their's. And now , it's all caught up with them , ass they use paycheck funds , to continue funding The Pentagon's operations , while begging Congress for more money.
Let's take a historical view at how Vanderbilt University and Vanderbilt Hospital , treats Veterans.
Did you know , the Feds give employers , a monthly chunk of money , to help employers give paychecks to minorities ? Did you know , the Feds have hiring quotas ? Did you know , minorities have priority hiring privileges ? Did you know , minorities have bonus points for being minorities ? Well , did you even know , employers use a point system for hiring ? Did you even know , illegals counted ass minorities and got the same hiring benefits ? Do you even care ? At one time , Veterans had the same hiring status ass minorities. And , if you were a wounded Veteran , there was a national job listing , just for those who fit that category. If you wanted a job , all you had to do , was see your local Vet Rep , who had the job listing and by Golly , you could pick what you wanted from that list AND you were hired that very instant. Well , one day , Congress realized that American Veterans were not minorities. Instead , they were just plain ole' Americans. And with that bit of wisdom , America's Veterans , joined the ranks of everyone else , who were not a minority and were looking for a job.
When Congress took away , Veteran's hiring benefits , Vanderbilt suddenly lost money from the Feds , in that monthly chunk of paycheck money. So , Vanderbilt put out a message to everyone , telling Veterans to stand up and be counted. All you had to do , was call personnel and inform them , that yes indeedy dee , you are a Veteran and you want to counted. Little did they suspect , that was a death notice to their employment. Over a 2 year period , Vanderbilt quietly retired ass many Veterans ass possible , while replacing them with other minority type people. In doing so , Vanderbilt has been able to brag about their hiring different people from various cultures , while increasing the amount of their Federal funded paycheck money , at the cost of removing Veterans from their jobs , all because they are Americans. Hmm.....Damn , don't you wish you were an American Veteran ?

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

 

Saara Akaash Goes Pro

BVD News - I've been bombarded with requests , for any Saara Akaash video , yes , any. OK , I've heard , I've listened and I've got it. In this scene , Monica and Vikram have gone pro , and are giving The Indian Air Force , dancing lessons. Oh , by the way , this clip is also the ending of the last season and I don't want to give away anything. Also , COMCASTIC COMCAST , is no longer showing Saara Akaash reruns. There are other Saara Akaash posts in this blog. Enjoy.
video

 

The Pentagon Budget

The Pentagon - here's the latest , on the budget problems at The Pentagon. Keep in mind , the Air Force foresaw these problems and have been busy culling their officer ranks , to lesson their own problems. Meanwhile , The Pentagon has been paying their bills , from the payroll accounts of the Army and Navy. That's no joke.
video

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

 

Sheriff Headley , WHAT ?

Franklin , Tennessee - while BVD was doing some research , he came across Sheriff Headley and his band on MySpace. Hmm....OK...let's go look.
HOLYCRAPOMOHLEY ! Is this really his band ? This guy in Headley's band is telling a secret about his looking under a friend's bed , and finds bottles and bottles of penis growth pills. What is going on with Sheriff Headley and his band ? Are they taking these pills to get ready for the ladies after a concert ? Or , are they for picking up girls at the mall ? Hmm...maybe , they take those pills to impress each other. I can see them back stage , talking and showing off , right now. " Hey man , I've grown another inch , lookie lookie look." or , " Oh wow man , mine's still an inch bigger than your's , hee , hee , hee." or , how about , " You are still half the man I am. "
I don't know and I don't wanna know. I have'nt had a woman complain about me after I had 'em. So , I don't take any of those kinds of pills. Hmm..so that's why the Sheriff was needing all of those Lortabs. It was to help ease the pain and swelling , from taking all those penis enlargement pills. Now , why did'nt the newspaper tell us these things ?
Hm..do ya think , if Sheriff La Cates was taking those penis pills , would he have been just as popular ass Headley , before the election ? Maybe size does matter.

Monday, November 26, 2007

 

Franklin Police Exposed

Franklin , Tennessee - I had promised my readers , I would keep them informed , about a burglary , that took place and with all the information at hand , Franklin Police can not solve the crime.
Here's what the new math has figured out. Franklin Police have some rouge officers running around. That's right people , these officers are doing the " Jay Johnson ". They have taken powers that do not exist , and have made themselves , " The Law ". Sounds like something out of science fiction , don't it ?
Remember , not too long ago , the paper told about a drug bust involving several different people and their drug route leads to Mexico ? Well , did you know , Franklin Police used cameras in their homes and there's no paper work authorizing them ? It was during this time , a house was burgled for over 10,000 dollars. If Franklin Police Dect. Black solves this case , he will expose his fellow officers. AND , let us not forget , all of the negative publicity Franklin's Police Department would receive , if this got into the news. Why , what would CNN's Robin think ? Oh , the dread of it all.
One of the license plates , given to Mr. Black , goes to an address in Belle Meade. This guy is'nt doing to bad for himself , not bad at all. By selling all that stuff , at no up front cost to himself , he easily affords to live the good life. Must be nice to steal stuff , sell it , live big and be above the law , all at the same time. Hell , this guy is the law. Think I'm making this story up ? The information you need , for conducting your own investigation , is right here , in this blog. Go look it up for yourself. Please , don't take just my word for it. This is the stuff , your local paper can't talk about.

 

The Pentagon's Budget

The Pentagon - now that President Bush has spent 10 trillion dollars , that does'nt exist. Americans are losing their homes , while the Stock Market falls , causing Americans to lose even more. To add to Bush's Strategic Master Disaster Plan for America , America's Armed Forces are also in a bind. After all of those 80 million dollar parties for new equipment that does'nt work , billions have been spent on research that was'nt necessary , and this does not include lunch , The Pentagon is now complaining , that if they don't get , more new money to splurge with , President Bush's wars will have to shut down , before all of the killing becomes , " Mission Accomplished ".



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brought to you by courtesy of The Pentagon

Sunday, November 25, 2007

 

Holiday Message to our Troops

The Pentagon - Gates gave his holiday message , to all of the Armed Services , while taking a break at his mansion , during his travels around the world , in an exclusive Air Force 747 , at tax payer's expense , to write his memoirs.
Due to The Pentagon's present money woes , there was no money budgeted for this special holiday message to make the rounds , so Gates had his message posted on the visitor's bulletin board , in The Visitor's Center , at The Pentagon. All military personnel , were encouraged to drop by and read Gates' words. Of course , they had to pay their own fare to get there. Therefore , BVD News decided , at no cost to our service men and women , to bring you his holiday message.
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To all our men and women in America's Armed Forces , Thank You !
brought to you by courtesy of The Pentagon's Visitor's Center

Monday, November 19, 2007

 

Vanderbilt Swings New Rule in SEC

Vanderbilt University - BVD News heard about the new SEC football rules and talked with Vanderbilt Football Coach Bobby Johnson , to get the skin on the Pigskin.
BVD : Coach , explain this new ruling to me , like I'm a three year old.
Coach Johnson : I'm happy to oblige you BVD. Vanderbilt , can now have any amount of time removed from the clock , at any time Vanderbilt sees fit , only when Vanderbilt has the superior score.
BVD : Butt coach , what if the game is still in the first quarter ?
Coach Johnson : The quarter does'nt matter. What does matter , Vanderbilt can remove all the quarters and all the remaining minutes , from the clock , only when Vanderbilt is winning. You see , the math is so simple , even our own football players can get an " A " , with this one.
BVD : I don't understand this coach , how can Vanderbilt swing the rules in their favor ?
Coach Johnson : Well , again , it's actually very simple. You see , Vanderbilt owns an Army of legal eagles. And , let's not forget all the lobbyists , Vanderbilt has on their slush fund payroll. If you understand how President Bush , operates under his Bushyisms , you find that Vanderbilt can re-interpret the SEC football rules , thus enabling their legal eagles to re-rite the rules and make 'em stick. I predict , that come next year , Vanderbilt will go all the way :)
BVD : What about this new rule being used by other teams , I mean , .............
Coach Johnson : Hey , hold on to that thought BVD. You've gotta understand , it was Vanderbilt's money and Vanderbilt's legal eagles , that made this new rule possible. Which in turn simply means , it's all about " The Vanderbilt ". Got that ?
BVD : You mean , .....
Coach Johnson : You got it. This ruling belongs only to Vanderbilt.
BVD : Wooooow , Vanderbilt can't loose with this one.
Coach Johnson : groan , aww , sometimes I don't know , BVD. I just don't know.

 

Them Thar Hillz

Paris Hilton has made another movie. " The Hillz ". After this scene was shot , a rumor rampantly spread , the actor needed his nose disinfected for staff. While watching this scene , I felt the need , for a Tetanus shot.
The Hills is now playing on COMCASTIC COMCAST. While this movie is advertised ass being comical , I fell asleep. Thank COMCAST , for that DVR , which I had disinfected.


video

 

How Old ?


Now that the holidays are here , it's also birthday time. Kaden got his. Here , he explains his age.
" Yep " , he said , " I'm this old. "

Sunday, November 18, 2007

 

Oooooo Vandy !


Vanderbilt University - well , UT won yesterday's football game , after trailing Vanderbilt for three quarters. Those last seconds really hurt. Rumor has it , next time , Vanderbilt will ask to remove the final seconds in the last quarter , if they are winning.
Vanderbilt fans kept yelling , " Next year is HERE ! " For some reason , I don't think they know what year it is. Maybe , if Vanderbilt would graduate some of those 6th year seniors , the rest of the student body would get a clue and maybe , move forward in the world.

Pictured - 6 month old Kaden got excited over the final score. GO U.T. GO ! ! Wow , U.T. , I can spell ! Mommy , I can spell U.T. !

Meanwhile , this house won't be the same again. Everyone is going to Home Depot for their special on orange paint.

Friday, November 16, 2007

 

Christmas on Ebay


For those contemplating Christmas shopping on Ebay , be ready for shipping costs shock. Many items are costing more in the shipping department , than the costs of the item. Also , I've seen an upwards shift in auction prices. Maybe you should wait till after Christmas to buy , eh ? That may be the time to buy for next year's Christmas.
Oh yeah , another bidding tip - I do not bid on any item when another person with a zero bid history is present. That person may be upping the bid amount or even be the seller. This shopping season , I've noticed more zero bidders and the item is'nt worth their bid. Hmm.....besides , let the item go , there will be another with someone else. Also , I've noticed more sellers are cleaning out their closets. I'll watch those with really low starting bids. There might be a bargain in there. I do not shop the Ebay stores. The prices are to high. Remember - there will be another one , just like this one. Be patient , watch many items to get a feel for the market on what you are looking for and then go bid. Another tip , while comparing the bid prices , right now , seller's shipping costs are all over the board. Ass silly ass it sounds , you need to compare those shipping costs. Some sellers are now double dipping into insurance costs. For example , if insurance costs are 1.75 $ , the seller will add 3.50 $ to the shipping costs. Some sellers are charging 5 dollars for used newspaper to wrap the item. I'm not kidding. If you are not sure of something , the seller has said in the listing , or even if you think something is missing , just ask. If you get an answer , that does'nt make sense , or if their reply does'nt answer your question , don't bid. Remember , there will be another one.
One type of auction , which I do not understand why anyone would bid on , is the live auction. These auctions have buyer premium costs added to the total. It's just an excuse and/or gimmick to gouge the buyer of more $$$$$$. You can expect another 20% of the total added in to the final total costs. Again , move on and remember , there will be another item , just like this one.
I will not bid on an item with a reserve. The seller knows what they want for their stuff. If the seller really wants to unload their item , they will put it on the auction block and that's that.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

 

Saara Akaash Writers


With the writing strike continuing , people are writing their own Saara Akaash scripts. Here's mine - Monika is invited to America , to receive the Medal of Valor from President Bush , later , while Monika is on the phone with the AOC , she saves the president from a toilet bomb and gets a big hug from Bush and receives the Heroine Valedictorian Award for Heroin.
Just as she gets on the plane returning to India , she gets a phone call from President Bush , inviting her , to be his partner on the TV show , Dancing with the Stars. Just as she accepts the invitation , Vikram calls , to ask if she is having a good time , when at that moment , Karan , her other husband , has calling breaking thru into her service , to ask her , if she is having a good time and to find out , who is on the other phone line , while Yaavar eaves drops during his dancing lessons. Meanwhile , Red Dragon plans his return from the dead and Naaz escapes from prison , vowing to take revenge against Monika , for stealing her husband and she suspects Monika of shooting her dog behind her back.
You'll find more Saara Akaash posts in this blog. Enjoy !

 

Killing Animals

Channel 4 News did an inside investigation , on how animal shelters kill unwanted animals. The quick and cheap way , is what is called the heart shot. Their video was so damning , a vet was suspended from his duties.
So , here's my question. What about Devil Worshipers ? Well , what about them ? After all , Williamson County is a popular haven for such activity.
video video

 

Terrorists Right Here



Franklin , Tennessee - on NBC News , an embarrassed CIA and FBI can not answer how a terrorist got inside of them and hold a top level security clearance. Well , what defines " terrorist " ? Our government in the past , called terrorist , " students ". Today , we know a terrorist does not have to perform destructive acts , to be a terrorist.
Let's look in our own neighborhood. State Farm Insurance is actively seeking out , classified military information. Why ? I don't have the answer to that question. I do know , Franklin Police are doing everything they can to help them. The scary thing about this ? What is State Farm doing with that kind of information and why.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

 

Avoiding Da Noid

Franklin , Tennessee - how many times have people asked themselves , " How do I avoid getting a traffic ticket " ? Well , my friends , grab your coffee and have a sit.
Did you know , there are vehicles running around Franklin , with a license plate that is not on file ? How do they do they that , or , how do I get one of those ? The law regulates the law , which means , the law can get all of the " not on file " plates , they want. When an officer pulls you over , and runs the plate , the officer thinks you are on some secret mission and will let you go :)
The other trick , is to have a dealer plate. For some strange reason , the law does not keep up with dealer plates. Here in Williamson County , the criteria for getting a dealer plate , is'nt that tough. And the law will probably let you keep on truckin. If you are pulled over and it looks like the officer is going to write the ticket , just mention Jay Johnson's name and that this vehicle is for him or some family member or other , what ever , kind of thing. Of course , you could also name drop Alexander's :)
There ya go kiddies , enjoy , and HEY , be careful out there. This town has some bad cops riding around in CALEA accredited , police cars.

 

What Is America Thinking


Has anybody looked at America these days ? Does anybody care ? America used to be a country for peace. Today , America is all about , who will we bomb today ? Americans have fallen asleep on watch. Americans are responsible for their government's actions. Instead of promoting world peace , America is debating which piece of the world to bomb next.
President Bush can not give an answer to why America is in Iraq , while he is busy writing his memoirs for future generations to enjoy.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

 

Veterans Day , My Say

Yep , I'm a Veteran from the good ole Nam days. The Navy , I think it was , I was in. Yep , I still remember being on station during Sundays , battle stations on holidays , targets locked , regardless of what day it is or was.
All the Navy gave me was a continuous reminder of how stupid I was for joining up. They said I would get a high school education , Not ! They said I would have VA benefits , Not ! Promises , promises , promises. That's ALL I got.
When the war was grinding down , the Navy complained of being short of money. Soon after , 208,000 people were told , there was'nt any money to promote them. In The Pentagon , 23 admirals were promoted.
I was promised the best in health care. Later , we learned , most of the Navy's doctors , were'nt really doctors after all. They were just friends of someone in the Pentagon and they needed a job.
I saw several highly intelligent people take on the Navy with lawsuits , for breach of contracts. Yep , they won. And with that , 83,000 more people were informed , there was no money to promote them. The Pentagon promoted 28 admirals.
When I came home from over there , I did'nt get a band or a parade. I did have one of the few Honorable Discharges , The Navy was giving out. Ya see , at the time , the VA was so over run with wounded , orders had been given to shit on ass many people ass possible , to avoid handing out those honorable papers , so ass to hopefully cut down on the number of veterans using the VA. Politicians have no problem butchering Americans. And they have no problem ignoring butchered Americans either.
So , what do I have to be thankful for on Veterans Day ? Let's me see here - I'm not physically wounded , I have my face , arms , legs and a brain intact. I can vote , even though Bush showed my vote does'nt matter. I can't think of nuthing else.
To our veterans fighting Bush's War , watch your 6.
While those reading this may think I'm being negative , they were'nt there. I wuz. Oh yeah , by the way , remember , right here in popular Franklin , Graceworks does not help veterans. Mrs. King says , " Help one veteran and there will be more in here worse than flies on a cow pie. "
In the mean time , states like Iowa , have passed laws , making things difficult for employers to hire veterans.
In Tennessee , it is very hard for veterans to qualify for food stamps , so ass to have money available for immigrants.
Being out of the service , I can blog anything I want , while today's service personnel , do not have freedom of blog.

 

Your Password is YOUR Life


I thought I'd steal this one , since this is America , where it's become unAmerican to be honest. The University of Wyoming wants everyone to be more aware of their password.
When dealing with adults , it's possible to help them to learn by mentioning their underwear. I guess it's something like politicians and diapers. It's steal the same mentality.
Today , some bloggers use programs to steal your password when you log in to their blog to leave a comment. Some web sites now install password stealing cookies. And on and on and on. Hey , be careful out there on the web.

 

What Are U Thinking


The writer's strike continues against writing , so , here is a picture many people are talking about. Here's your chance to share with the world , what you think you see :)

Yes , there are responses to the other pics , I don't think it would be wise to show them here.

Friday, November 09, 2007

 

Put in A Caption


Everyone is getting bored with the same ole reruns , while the writer's strike on writing continues. So , what is a bored person to do ? Well , why not become a writer yourself ? Here's how - check out this picture. What is this young one thinking ? If your thoughts are good enough , I'll put 'em here.

 

An Inconvenient Truth

Franklin , Tennessee - it's amazing , how many people brag about Franklin and most of those people have'nt lived here very long. Afterall , Franklin is just a quaint little town , within easy driving distance of Nashville. One thing very few people know about Franklin , is the crime problem.
Did you know , Franklin Police have 20 detectives ? Did you know , they all average 30 investigations at any one time ? That's 600 incidents of crime in Franklin , at any one time. One of those investigations is a burglary. The door locks were broken and 10,000 dollars of theft and vandalism occurred. This incident involves Franklin Police officers and includes stealing this years Red Cross Christmas surprise.
My , what a wonderful town , this Franklin , is to live in. Don't you agree ? I know Jay Johnson is sooo proud of his police department.

For the benefit of those who don't know. Yes , Franklin Police has replaced their Deputy Chief. Is'nt it interesting , JJ has refused to say why the other Deputy leaft ? The paper said , the former deputy was doing an excellent job. Both Chief Jackie and JJ concurred on his exemplary job performance , and now he has quit and no one is talking.
In my opinion , the man's soul was not for sale.

 

That Holy FOP

Franklin , Tennessee - for those who do not receive the Williamson Herald , the Fraternal Order of Police , Lodge 41 , wants Sheriff Headley to resign from law enforcement , because of his arrest on various drug charges.
Well , OK , I don't have a problem with that , after all , ya know what the good book says , " Let any FOP member , without sin , cast the first law. " How many officers , from the Franklin Police Department , have membership with that FOP ? Here I have evidence , of Franklin Police being involved in burglary and theft of 10,000 dollars. Various officers know this , butt , since their FOP is a family of their own , they are not going to squeal on each other. Hey , brothers don't rat on their brothers , aint that so , Sgt. Smithson ?
I've been asked if the sheriff is guilty. I don't know , I was'nt there. Butt , it seems that Lodge 41 of the FOP was there. ( yeah , right )
The only reason that FOP wants Headley out of the way , is because of all the sheriff wanna be's. I say , let the law give Sheriff Headley due process and have the FOP shut up. If someone wants to be the sheriff , then they need to get involved in the next election and let the voters decide.
Oh yeah , why does'nt that FOP kick out their bad brothers ? Simple , they have'nt been caught. Since Franklin Police are doing the investigation , I don't expect anything will happen. Too much information is being ignored , which has caused the investigation to come to an abrupt dead end.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

 

FRANKLIN POLICE HISTORY

Franklin , Tennessee , BVD News reporting today - Here's a page from the Franklin Police history book
Downtown Franklin was having a nasty burglar problem. Franklin Police were unable to catch or solve who was doing these things. Even the downtown Bike shop got hit ( across from the new justice center ). It was that bad.
Finally , someone had a brain fart and suggested a steake out. Soo , one evening , while everyone was enjoying themselves eating catered steak downtown , downtown Franklin got hit again HHmmmm , they just couldn't catch those thieving burglars and couldn't understand why.
Well , one fine morning , a Franklin Police officer starts to get into his patrol car to start his shift , only to discover his car was open , and inside , was the Banana Boy sound asleep at the wheel.
With a little detective work and questioning that Boy , Franklin Police learned one of their very own had the Boy's back.
I'll give you a clue to who the officer was. Remember at one time , downtown Franklin had a walking patrol ? There was this really pissy bald headed fart , giving parking tickets to anyone and everyone for no reason. He was reeeeally upset for having his patrol car taken away.
Oddly enough , with him walking around downtown , there were no more burglaries reported downtown. And NO ! , Due to politics , this officer could not be fired , or even be charged with the crimes.

 

Got Cha !


Franklin , Tennessee - BVD got to interview the new incoming mayor , Mayor elect Schroer.
BVD : So you have already spoken with this city's administrator , Jay Johnson ?
Mayor about to be Schroer : Why yes , all of the newly elected people sat down in a meeting with JJ and he told us about Franklin and he even passed out , specially prepared folders , to us. JJ is just a swell guy , I look forward to working with him.
BVD : So , this meeting was private , right ? Does'nt that go against the secret meetings clause that Jay Johnson is so adamant about being illegal ?
Schroer : Hey , hold on there , we are not elected officials yet.
BVD : So tell me , so I can tell the citizens of Franklin , are you the newly elected mayor or not ?
Schroer : Well of course I am.
BVD : So you have already broken one of Franklin's laws.
Schroer : Wait a minute , .......
BVD : Ha ha ha ha ha ha Schroer looks dumb founded , ha ha ha ha. He got you , ha ha ha ha , you have'nt been in office yet , and JJ got you , ha ha ha ha
Schroer : What are you talking about ?
BVD : JJ , he has already played you , ha ha ha ha. How can you not be an elected official and meet with JJ about what you are planning to do for Franklin ass mayor ? You took part in a illegal meeting , a meeting that goes against JJ's own philosophy.
Schroer : Butt , butt , JJ was there.
BVD : Of course he was. JJ only abwhores such meetings when he has'nt been included. JJ has got you looking like the city's idiot. Oh hey , are'nt you glad , Franklin still has The Review Appeal ? It's all the news you want , only it's 4 weeks late and it aint the news anyway.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

 

The Contest Continues




There's has been lots of responses to the Saara Akaash Contest and now there's a part two.
With no sight seen , the writer's continue their strike on writing.
OK , here's the question :
Which of these women are the real spy in Saara Akaash ? And remember , no cheating on this one. Anyone caught cheating , will not be the winner.

Monday, November 05, 2007

 

The Saara Akaash Contest

Saara Akaash is having a contest. I don't know what the prizes are , I just know , that the winner of the contest wins. So here's what's going on - writers all over the world , have joined hands in support of the union's strike on writing. So , with this episode dangling in mid sentence , everyone , everywhere , is in total suspense as to why Yavaar is so upset. What is going on ? What should the script say for Yavaar ? This is your BIG chance to become a writer.

Yavaar has suddenly discovered :

Someone stole his Viagra.
His turbin was gone.
He had been dancing with Monika the whole time.
That was not a woman he was dancing with
Monika already has 3 husbands.
Someone misspelled turban.
Saara Akaash will be back next season !
Monika will do a movie trilogy without Yaavar
Monika has several commercial contracts with The Indian Air Force , to illistrate her courage against terrorists like Yaavar
Yaavar's brother will return from the dead in a future episode
Monika and Vikram will perform on the TV show , Dancing with the Stars

There you are my friends. Help out the good people , who make Saara Akaash happen and help write the script part for Yaavar. And remember , the winner of this contest wins.
You will find more Saara Akaash posts in this blog.



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Saturday, November 03, 2007

 

Our Sadly Funny Truths About Americans

While reading today's Tennessean , the reasons for Bush being president was enlightening. I'll share what was printed - " The reason behind bush getting elected " . A random sample of 1,000 Americans revealed that 2 out of 3 Americans believe in the truth of miracles set forth in the Bible. Like Moses parting the Red Sea and God creating the universe in 6 days.
I can assume that those in the survey also believe in Santa Claus , the Easter Bunny , the Tooth Fairy and The Great Pumkin. Now do you understand how Americans got Bush and why Franklin has Jay Johnson ?

 

Truths


I thought I'd pass this one along. We spend so much time at work , working on the internet.

Friday, November 02, 2007

 

Book Sale

Franklin's Library is having their book sale again. The good books were culled before giving the public a chance to see them. It is amazing , at the money , the library throws away , by giving the books to their buddies , who sells them for mega bucks. Only those people , who are in the correct political circles are allowed to " buy " the books , before the public sees them.
If you are going , I'm telling you now , there's nuthin to buy. Yes , really , the good stuff is gone.
Buy the way , go tomorrow and the prices will be half off.
Go to Brentwood and you will pay through the nose for the same book at Franklin.

 

Aaawwwwww Britney ! ! !



I almost landed on the floor this morning , from a severe bought of laughter , while watching CNN. They did a sound off " YOUR VOICE " about Britney's monthly income and expenses , aaaand a teacher was complaining. Well teacher , I think it's obvious why you do what you do , and why Britney does what she does. The money part is not rocket science. Britney is just smarter than you , that's all. Oh , and teacher , check out your spelling.

 

That Damn Pot Game


BVD was writing this morning , when his son had a question.

Jimmy : Dad ?
BVD : Hey son , I thought you were getting ready for school.
Jimmy : Aww , you know how fickle the FSSD is. Even they are not sure what a school day is on the calendar.
BVD : Ha ha ha. Yeah , what's on your mind son ?
Jimmy : The paper says the law is going to sell a man's property because he broke the grass law. With all the things wrong with the law these days , I think this is wrong.
BVD : Explain yourself.
Jimmy : Well , those drug enforcement officers use grass and they are'nt arrested.
BVD : You have a point , butt remember , this is America.
Jimmy : Why can't America smell what it's shoveling and make the necessary changes ?
BVD : My son , you will have to ask our politicians that question.
Jimmy : I'm going to be a grown up one of these days , are'nt I , Dad ?
BVD : Yes. ( smiling )

Thursday, November 01, 2007

 

That New 2 Minute Rule


Franklin , Tennessee , BVD News - BVD heard about the new 2 minute technology rule being enforced in Franklin's government and BVD went to Jay Johnson for his 2 minutes worth.
BVD : JJ , er , may I call you JJ ?
JJ : Sure , may I call you BVD ?
BVD : Of course. What's this 2 minute thing ?
JJ : Simple. The people of Franklin expect more and more of their government and it's taking up too much of my government time. So , in bringing new technology into this great city , I brought in this 2 minute timer.
BVD : Uh , sir , these days , government costs more. Don't the people deserve more from their government dollars ?
JJ : Be careful BVD.
BVD : ? Sir ?
JJ : Look , I'm the Administrator of this town. The sooner the people of Franklin realize it , the better , while I'm busy bringing in a new decade of government , to this little hick town , whether they like it or not , 2 minutes of my time is all any one person will get , at any one , 2 minute time , from now on. Got that ? Oh , and by the way , your 2 minutes are up.
BVD : Butt sir , I did not hear the 2 minute buzzer.
JJ : Ya don't have to , I've got a hearing implant that allows me to hear it. ( smiling ) Mr. Moore , come in here and remove BVD , so I can get to the next person.
BVD : I don't think this thing is turned on. Look , the lights don't work.
JJ : They don't have to. JACKIE !?!? Where are you !?!?

Franklin Police Chief " Jackie " Moore enters the room and motions for BVD to get out. In the hall way , BVD notices the chief also has a 2 minute gadget , dangling from his utility belt.
BVD : Um , chief , why do you have one of those ?
Chief Moore : Simple. When JJ has one of his moods , he expects me to get him off. So , if he can't do it in 2 minutes , ( smiling ) 2 bad.

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