Wednesday, April 30, 2008

 

Still Found Under Vanderbilt University Engineering School


Vanderbilt University - BVD News - BVD learned a moonshine still was operating in the Engineering Schools basement , with a capacity of producing 5,000 gallons of shine a week. When asked where the finished product was stored , BVD was told the demand was so great , there was'nt any to store. " I
know Vanderbilt is dedicated to being a dry university , butt , well , it is when you think about , I mean afterall , the stuff is drunk so fast , there is'nt any around to be found " said Sophomore student Hanns , who is in charge of taste testing and quality control.
Regarding graduation day , it's strictly BYOB

 

Vanderbilt University students start Graduation Early



Vanderbilt graduation parties started early at the Engineering school. BVD went on scene to find out why.
BVD : What's going on ? The finals have'nt started yet.
student : WE ARE PARTYING !
BVD : Yes , I can see that. Why are'nt you studying for your finals ?
student : STUDY FOR FINALS , ARE YOU KIDDING ? WE JUST FINISHED OUR TEST FILE FINALS WO HOOOO ! ! ! OOOOOOOOOPS , ow , I fall down , butt hey , I can get up , I'm ok , i'm reeealy .........ok , plop

 

Vanderbilt Graduation Traffic Flow


Vanderbilt University - Last night , Vanderbilt's Traffic and Parking set up signs to divert graduation traffic to facilitate access to designated parking areas

 

McCready Clears Her Throat


Franklin , Tennessee - BVD News got in a word with country music singer McCready , about the baseball player Clemens.

BVD : Mam , is it true , you had a sexual involvement with Mr. Clemens ?
McCready : Well , sure it is , Hun Bun.
BVD : Did you know he was taking illegal steroids ?
McCready : Whaaaaat ? I thought that was Viagra

 

Who's Got da Phone

Washington , D.C. - BVD News was there - last night on ABC , the big election question came up , concerning answering the phone at 3am. Sooo , they gave it a try and here is what happened.

video

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

 

Vanderbilt University gets ready for Graduation




Vanderbilt's campus was a buzz with activity ass road graders , dirt shovels , bob cats , dump trucks , and the Vanderbilt Grounds Department picked up trashed students and other people. BVD went to Kirkland Hall to check on the progress
BVD : Are'nt you cleaning up a little early this time of year ?
Zeppos : Actually no , ass you are aware , graduation ceremonies are 2 weeks away and we need this place looking in great shape for the parents and guests.
BVD : Well yeah , butt , the finals are'nt over yet.
Zeppos : Oh yes they are , thanks to the latest test file final test data banks , this semester was over with Rites of Spring , which reminds me , we've got to hide those things before anyone from the outside sees one. Thanks for reminding me
BVD : From the looks of things , Rites of Spring is still going on. What will you do with all those bodies ?
Zeppos : Pile 'em up at student health of course

 

Vanderbilt University is ready for Graduation Crowd



Vanderbilt cleaning crews had complained over the years about having to clean the toilets , during graduation , after people refused to flush them. This year , thanks to unionization , the toilets have been modified to make cleaning easier. Pictured , is cleaning crew supervisor Doghead , discussing the new changes.

Monday, April 28, 2008

 

Ebay's Fortune Making Machine

Some people have watched the late night TV ads , about making money on Ebay. Here is somethings that you are not told -

Don't give these ads any money. There are other sources with the same information and it's free

People with Ebay stores have a business already and use Ebay fees for a tax write off.

Ebay stores costs more than the 6 day auctions. Let's see - there are the usual fees per auction plus the monthly store fee. Stores will cost about 21 % on average. Can you afford that , without being in a business ?

So , rethink your Ebay again. And of course , have fun.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

 

Chairman chairs new post


Vanderbilt University - BVD News for The HUSTLER - Vanderbilt's Civil Engineering Chairman , Ed Thackston , at the School of Engineering , has a new chair to sit in , after getting busted with some under age drinkers.
The drinking was going fine , until some graduating Vanderbilt students , started making fun of Thackston's size , saying he was'nt tall enough , to drive a zambonnie.
Well , one thing led to another and Thackston threatened to degrade and downgrade , some graduating grad grades and that's when the singing started , that brought the attention of Vanderbilt Police , to the scene. It seems that Thackston's senility , had forgotten the words to his favorite sorority. The one he was a member in , during his younger years ass an undergraduate.
So , if you happen to be going past Vanderbilt's jail house , you might hear Thackston singing about his zambonnie.

Now when I was young I would spend my dreams
That I might drive the zambonnie machine
I'd guess they'd say I was a big ass ass could be
Ass all the faculty would look up to meee , , , MEEEE !

Pause ,

Yeeeah , I wanna drive the zambonnie
I wanna drive the zambonnie machine

( go back to the top and continue )

 

Unreputable Leah Russell



I told everyone , I would keep them up to date , regarding unreputable Ebay sellers. Check this out. Leah Russell sold 3 navy plaques , that have water and heat damage. The wood has leached out it's stain and Leah says it's a paint job. I will let you look at the pictures , so you can decide for yourself.
He sent the seller emails , wondering why anyone would take his word , on what he says about his items on Ebay. Yeah , he lets the buyer know , up front , they are an idiot , for taking his word ass truth. Hm , a strange way to tell the buyer , that he is a liar. Another way to tell , something is wrong , is that the item received , does not look like the item in the auction picture.
Well , the next thing you know , it's a negative feedback war and it looks like the buyer won. This is the first time , I've seen a ebay seller , argue with the buyer , blaming them for the problems that were not stated in the auction listing. I mean , Leah is blaming the buyer for not catching his lies.
Leah Russell uses the name - maggios , on ebay. His email is - hurricaneranch@fone.net , and no , Leah does not give refunds , despite his items having mice feces. Look in the picture. Do you think that is dirt ?
This was a PayPal transaction and the buyer is getting no co-operation from PayPal , since it is a subsidiary of Ebay. And of course , Ebay is of no help either. This is an excellent example of buyer protection , from both of them.
At the time of this post , Leah has over 40 negative feedbacks. He had stayed away from Ebay for a while , thinking it would help his feedback score , which it did not , and now he has added another 3 strikes.
So , anyone else know a unreputable Ebay'er ? I'll put 'em in here.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

 

Naval Memories


Franklin , Tennessee - there's a new blogger in town , called NAVAL MEMORIES. I think this person is going to sell his collection of Navy memorabilia , rather than be another talk on this town. His name is Mike Walters and seems to be quite friendly and talkative. He has a uncle , who spent 28 years in the United States Navy. He and Mike have teamed up , to sell out this incredible collection of wall hangers. Yes , I'm sure there will be other items besides wall hangers. If you need something to cover up that annoying hole in your wall , here's your chance to get an interesting item and a piece of Navy history. Of course , some of those items are heavy enough to pull the wall down. Hmmmm. Go and take a look. I've provided a link in my park. There is'nt much to see at this time , however , I'm sure that will change soon. Enjoy.

Friday, April 25, 2008

 

VANDERBILT TRAUMA MAKES MEDICAL FIRST


Vanderbilt University Medical Center , BVD News - Today at the daily drink and meat , Vanderbilt Trauma Doc Morris announced a medical breakthru in emergency medical science. Morris has spent months studying why so many trauma patients have been dying before the Med students could get their hands on them. Finally , after more months of research , Morris realized the patients were already dead before their arrival.
The answer , Morris speculated , was a need to create a speedy transport for getting the patient to the horsespital before they died.
Morris got together with Chairman Thackston at The Engineering School and with a grant of 100 million dollars from NSF , they came up with the foot drag technique.
In the past , patients were dragged by their arms which slowed down the dragger due to a biomechanical , medical awkwardness , commonly found in Vanderbilt's own medical mechanical draggers , aka , employees. Now , the medical dragger ties a rope around the patient's ankles and drags them stated Morris , "Hey , now anyone can do it , even paramedics in the field ."
Morris continued saying , " Get the patient to us before sun set and we'll have a med student tend to them."

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

 

Vanderbilt Research Moves Forward


Vanderbilt University Medical Center - BVD News , Vanderbilt Trauma Doc Morris reports the differences between men and women , for robotic applications , has been established.
Doc Morris stated , " This is a major step forward for the Vanderbilt community , in it's efforts to reduce the need for biomedical mechanical draggers , staff and such. ( aka , employees ) It is obvious , in order to cut future operating expenses , men will be cheaper to own and operate. Just one flick of the switch and you've got free labor without all those female warm up problems , moody wirings , constant need for calibration , vocal squeals , missed adjustments , wrong voltages , or even AC/DC programming problems "
BVD : What will your robot use for an intelligence medium ?
Morris : That's a no brainer. Using Chairman Thackston , from the Engineering School , ass a working model , we developed a brainless gelatin based jello for it's mass media.
BVD : That's not very intelligent
Morris : Does'nt have to be , that's why we chose Thackston for this research.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

 

America's Furture Automotive Design ?



Yes boys and girls , ass Americans get squeezed more and more , it's just a matter of time , a mule will cost more than a Chevy. Are'nt you glad we have Bush in The White House ? Don't you wish we could keep him there longer ?

Historically speaking , Tennessee was once like this and it's only a matter of time , Tennesseans will return to the old ways. Mmmmm , there's nothing better , than watching a good piece of ass , at work.

Monday, April 21, 2008

 

Franklin Police Kum to Aid Their Cunt

Franklin , Tennessee - BVD wanted to write this one , butt I said " NO ". Over the weekend , a couple was doing yard work , like cutting grass and trimming tree limbs. While cutting off a large and dangerous limb , Janet Ledbetter put her face under the chainsaw , yelling to stop it , that was her tree. Yep , she did.
In the few years Janet has lived on Turnbrooke , she has never crossed " her " fence to mow the grass , pick up trash or fallen tree limbs. She has'nt even raked up the leaves. Meanwhile , she does dump trash over the fence , so she does'nt have to deal with it. Janet is so mean , she has ordered her dog to chase the neighbor's cat and even to attack her neighbor , while they sit in their own yard. She will open her garage door for the dog to come and go , since her back yard is fenced. Just how mean is Janet ? She kidnapped a cat and kept it locked up for a week without food or water. Yep , I do know about that and animal control will not investigate. Hm.
So , since she did'nt get her way , with her tree and limbs , Janet called Franklin Police , claiming she had been threatened with a chain saw. While waiting for them to show , Janet went to the carefully piled up tree limbs and drug them out onto the street , making them a road hazard.
Two Franklin Police officers showed up and began asking questions , they refused to identify themselves or give their names. Hm. Meanwhile , it became obvious , Janet was lying and was acting in her true bitchy form. You see , Janet is fucking a Franklin Police officer and so , she thinks she has special privileges and clout with the law.
The couple spent the rest of the day laughing about her and the incident. Oh yeah , of course word has gotten out also and everyone has had a good laugh.
Janet works at Vanderbilt University and has a close relationship with Dick Black , with the Franklin Police Department.

BVD : Man O man , she must have some kind of sweet meat
Jerry : I don't know and I don't want to know
BVD : Oh ? Why not ?
Jerry : You've seen what comes and goes over there. You know that thing has got to be wallered out to over size. I'd need a 2 x 4 and a safety harness , just to keep from falling in. If a person falls in there , you won't ever find 'em.
BVD : Ha ha ha ha ha ha ah ! Maybe that's why she can't keep a husband around
Jerry : Or anybody else for that matter
BVD : Well , besides , when you've got what she has , you don't need just one man anyway
Jerry : Ha ha ha ha Oh STOP IT , ha ha ha ha I can't breathe ,
BVD : So , how do you like living so close to that red light district ?
Jerry : I think there should be a special tax for it. Ass many men that come and go over there , you know FSSD would never hurt for money again

Friday, April 18, 2008

 

Vanderbilt University in Chairman Thackston's office


Vanderbilt University - BVD seeing Jerry , grabbed him , and took him to Vanderbilt University School of Engineering , Chairman Thackston's office and this is what they encountered.
Thackston was mumbling to himself , " No one can find me in here. Hee Hee Hee "
Jerry told BVD , " Shush , let's not bother him. "
BVD : You know what he will say when he finds out you were here and ( giggling ) , he did'nt see you
Thackston : It's so dark , not even Randi will find me. Hee Hee , wait , where's the light switch , where's the door , squirming ) OMG , I'm stuck !
Jerry : At least he's warm and happy
BVD : laughing
Jerry : C'mon , giggling , let's not bother him
Randi Hall : Jerry , have you seen Dr. Thackston lately , I can't seem to find him
Jerry : Hm. Maybe he is hiding from you :)

 

Ms. Puud Foresaw Earthquake


Franklin , Tennessee - BVD Bloggtographer went to see Ms. Puud. This mysterious black cat , who knows all and sees all , accurately predicted Tennessee's earthquake this morning.
Her owner says she predicts events all the time , for example , like predicting Bush's next fuck up and ha ha ha , get this , NEWS 2 gets their weather reports from her. The owner continued , saying Ms. Puud has a perfect batting record , having never missed out on a prediction or snow fall.
When asked how she does it , the owner replied , " It's something in the grass. "
Ms. Puud will scratch palms by appointment only and tells everyone to bring their own grass.

 

Zeppos Googles Google


Vanderbilt University - BVD News Bloggtographer - yep , despite what happened to Chancellor Gee several years ago , Vanderbilt's newbie , Chancellor Zeppos , went ahead with Googling Google.
Although first on the scene , Vanderbilt's First Fire Brigade , was reportedly , too busy , picking up the loose change and dollar bills , to fight the fire or look for Zeppos.
Mean while , addressing the news media , Zeppos' niece , Chancellor Ass In An Instant , Lil' Zeppos stated , " We have'nt found any remains of our beloved chancellor at this time. We are still too busy picking up the money. There were so many dollar bills lying around , it turned the brown pine needles green and we just can not have that , on " MY " Vanderbilt campus. "
Zeppos' secretary added , " The last words I heard him say , was that there must be more to life , than constantly begging for money , money , money and more money. "
Mean while , Department Chair Ed Thackston , from the Engineering School , gleamed with joy , ass he stepped up to voluntarily claim , again , the chancellorship.

 

Tennessee's Nursing Homes


I wrote this - I did some home work , after The Tennessean put out a piece about nursing homes wanting to limit the number of lawsuits against them.
OK , here's the skinny - this is doable. I'll point to Vanderbilt University and Vanderbilt Medical Center ass an example.
The problem is , nursing homes cannot hire enough " caring people " , this causes problems with the interned , because these people WILL NOT give a damn about their work or the interned. Thus , the nursing home gets sued and it's justified. If I were in a nursing home , I would expect to receive decent care. People working in these places , have not thought about their own selves being in these beds and so , here we go to court.
Can nursing homes stop the number of lawsuits ? Yep , they sure can. Will it be legal ? Constitutionally speaking , nope , butt , it is doable.
Let's go to Vanderbilt. This is a billion dollar monster , that is a profit making entity with tax exempt status. They get sued all the time because they do things they know , should'nt be done. So , their trick is to take away a person's rights to sue them. Yep , just like that , Vanderbilt dodges the bullet. I have found , that all you need , is to be in the billion dollar club. It's like this , when you have a billion dollars in your piggy bank , there is loose change lying around on the floor , to buy the law with. This is America. Judges , lawyers and the justice system ass a whole , are for sale. Vanderbilt has countless legal eagles in it's hip pocket and no , Vanderbilt does not miss this loose change. Hell , Vanderbilt has millions lying around , that it does'nt know what to do with. Must be nice , having piles of money , lying around on the floor , making people walk around it , to get to where they are going.
Now , about the nursing homes dilemma - they are not a billion dollar monster. However , what they can do , is join into a partner ship with each other , all across the state. In doing so , Tennessee's nursing homes will become a billion dollar monster , complete with loose change lying around , to buy out , a person's rights to sue them. And no , this money does not go to the person suing. It goes to the legal eagles , who takes care of such business.
And that folks , is how that gets done.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

 

Can You Kook ?

Franklin , Tennessee - BVD finally got to be on TV. In this short , he shows off , er , ah , shares , his cooking talents.

Ok , OK , Okaaaaaay , now ya know , who BVD is. Yep , that's him.

video

 

Reckless John McCain


Presidential hopeful , John McCain has stated , it would be Reckless , to pull out of Iraq.

OK , let's understand , the meaning of " Reckless ".

It's Reckless , lying to people , just to go to WAR , because Iraq does not have WMDs.

It's Reckless , to put Americans , 12 Trillion dollars in debt.

Ask yourself this question. " Are you better off now , than before Bush took the White House and the American economy , from the American people ? "

McCain has already said , he would continue Bush's strategy , of Recklessly spending money. Now , with that said , I guess McCain does know what he's talkin 'bout.

 

VANDERBILT UNIVERSITY Experiment Gone Wrong



Vanderbilt - BVD News - Nashville , Vanderbilt Medical Center Basement Laboratories Inc. & Co. Esq. LAMBDA Enterprises , Farm Subsidies U.S.A. Division
Professor Art , VUMC , Biomedical Anatomical Cadaver Dragger , stated , " I don't understand this , all we gave her was placeboes. "
BVD learned , this was part of an experiment to interact LAMBDA males with a non-LAMBDA female member.
BVD was at a lose for words , wondering how to report this , while being in the midst of gapping , open mouthed researchers.
While leaving , a man with one leg longer than the other , was telling Art , " Master , you ratfink , I tole you noe blue pills "

Friday, April 04, 2008

 

Alexander's Concerns

Franklin , Tennessee - last night , WSMV had a spot with Tennessee's former guv , Alexander. It seems he is concerned about Tennessee losing it's tax dollars , that come from gasoline sales , sometimes called a highway tax.
This money is supposed to be used to maintain Tennesse's highways and roads. President Bush has been redirecting those dollars , towards his war in Iraq. I wonder where the other dollars come from , to fund his war ?
Anyway , Alexander and Tennesseans need to be concerned about this , for several reasons. For starters , Tennessee's roads are in constant need of repair and let's not forget the bridges.
The only political way , to fix this problem is to raise gasoline taxes , to compensate for Bush's brain drain.
Another point of concern , is the fact , on any new construction project , involving TDOT , is 30 % of the money goes into political pockets. Yes , this equates to a need to raise taxes another 30 % , just to meet that project's monetary needs.
It's only a matter of time , Tennessee will become toooo expensive to live in.

 

Vanderbilt's Crime Watch


Vanderbilt University - The Tennessean , had an article about campus crime across this state and Vanderbilt , was the leading offender. Let me introduce to my readers , Ray Abernathy. He has cameras everywhere. Abernathy also has people working for him , whom I will refer to ass nomes.
All over the vanderbilt campus , including the hospital , you can find Abernathy's cameras. That is , if you know what to look for. You see , he uses those little innocent looking things , called spy cameras. Any ole nook and cranny are a place to set these things , and they can see everything that goes on.
Here's an example - A couple of years ago , there was a problem in the Vanderbilt ER. Stuff was missing and no one knew anything. In comes Abernathy and his spy cameras. A couple of weeks later , yep , they got him. A person , who was very well liked , was the thief. One day , while he was getting ready to leave , he got called to the carpet. His backpack was way over loaded. And nope , the weight did not belong to him.
Meanwhile , Abernathy's cameras are in places , where Vanderbilt employees , go to have some afternoon delight. Oh yeah , baby. He's got all kinds of skin flicks. You would be surprised , at the number of people , fucking on Vanderbilt's dime , filmed live , right on campus.
Oh yeah , about those nomes of his. They stay constantly busy. Putting cameras here and over there. Hell , they're everywhere. Including places , no one said anything about. Like dorm rooms for example. You see , there are some crimes that have taken place and there is no report. Co-eds have been accosted in their rooms and there are no reports. These little nomes have a way to get away with everything. So far.
You would be surprised , at some of the areas , those cameras can be found. And , you would be surprised at the crimes being committed and no one knows anything. Heh heh heh.
Abernathy has been so successful , Vanderbilt uses him to go off campus and gather intel. For example , lets say you have a lawsuit against Vanderbilt. Abernathy goes into your house with his cameras and leaves them for a while. During this time , your things get stolen , door locks are mysteriously broken and the police are of no help. Of course this is against the law. Butt , what are you gonna do about it ? Remember , Vanderbilt teaches law , Vanderbilt owns an army of legal eagles and Vanderbilt has deeper pockets than you. And , since Vanderbilt owns Tennessee's 5th largest police department , the local police will help them commit the crime. And that stuff they steal ? That gets shared with the local police and yes , the police know it's stolen property while they laugh about it.
I have no idea how many co-eds have been assaulted by the nomes , I just know it has happened more than once. Those little cameras operate 24 hours a day. Which means , the nomes know , when your home alone.

OK. Who in the Hell is Ray Abernathy ? Back around 1979 , Ray was a two bit loser , doing body work in his garage , in his yard and even out in the street. He would sell people on his 500 dollar paint job , that he will do for you , for just 299 dollars. Of course , since he is your friend , he will give you a break and do the work for 99 dollars.
One day , the state came a callin and took everything he owned , because he was operating a business without a license and for tax evasion. In the meantime , his wife was divorcing him for sexually assaulting his own little girl.
So , how did Abernathy become a private dick ? He paid 300 dollars , to get in on the ground floor , of a business to conduct undercover work , watching spouses fuck around , behind each other's back. This led to his becoming good friends with Metro Police. In time , Abernathy has made friends with various law enforcement agencies , doing covert work , using his little camera friends. Yep , you'll know if you've met Abernathy. He's that skinny little guy , with a terrible temper. And nope , over the years , therapy , has'nt helped him.
Although Abernathy is not a police officer , he has plenty of police friends and so , he feels he is a police officer and often acts like it.
He is constantly playing with his cameras. Experimenting with new ways to hide them. And , you would think , Vanderbilt would be an excellent environment , to do this , butt , would'nt you know it , ole' Ray has a manager friend , at a hotel. Yep , you guessed it. Ray Abernathy has been secretly filming people in their hotel rooms and I'll also let you guess what is on the films.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

 

Our Forgetfullness

Franklin , Tennessee - it just amazes me , how many educated people there are around me , who have more education than me , are smarter than me and know more than me. It's amazing , they take the time to write me , letting me know how much I do not know about things and even taxes.
Well smarty pants , yes , all of you. Explain to me , why our founding fathers went to all that trouble , of getting all dressed up , to attend the Boston Tea Party. And explain to me why , today , we have a tax on tea. Well Hell , we even have a tax on coffee , we have a tax on soft drinks , we even have a tax on our drinking water. Then , after paying our water taxes , we have a sales tax on our water fee usage. Hm. Just how much tax does our government need ?

One more time. We pay our government taxes , to build us a water system. Then we pay another , separate tax , called a water bill. This bill charges us for water and includes a sales tax. Yep , we pay 3 separate taxes , just to get a drink of water.

Now do you understand , why America's oil companies act the way they do ? Now , do you understand why , diesel fuel costs 4 dollars ? Now , do you understand ? Do you ?

 

Slick Trick

Here's the latest from my fun at Ebay. PayPal screwed up and I had to redo my account. PayPal is totally dedicated to their obtuse view towards their customers. If I was a billion dollar corporation , I suppose I would adopt that very attitude also.

Mean while , back at the ranch. Here's a slick trick I learned about , using Ebay. There's this contractor , doing a job in California. He lives in Clinton's home state. He uses the mail address , at the job site in California , to receive his Ebay purchases. He buys military items on Ebay , for his Ebay store. The price for his items , are raised 4 times , what he paid for them. And of course , this little business is fully tax deductible. He gets a tax cut for his Ebay biz and he can use Ebay for tax reasons , with his construction business. How sweet it must be. Are'nt you happy for him ?

In Tennessee , contractors deceive people everyday and I wonder how many of them are pulling this little slick trick ?

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