AIMLESSLY UNBALANCED

Some where in IRAQ , during Operation Swarmer. Col. Johnson gives a media circus interview.
CNN : What can you tell us ?
COL : This operation has been an incredible success , ass you already know.
CNN : Butt we have'nt seen anything
COL : Sure you have , look around. ( points to rubble )
CNN : Col. , that's a house under construction
COL : Well , you get the idea , take a picture of it. Also , we captured six munition caches , used in the manufacture of IED's
CNN : Can we see some of the captured goods ?
COL : Sargeant , bring that item over here , NOW ! ! !
THUNK ON THE GROUND ! ! ! ! !
CNN : Col , that's a rock
COL : Sir , I can assure you , that's part of an IED
CNN : Where are the IRAQ troops ?
COL : points to a Hum Vee , " Over there "
CNN : That's it ? That's all of the them ?
COL : Yes , how many were you expecting after three years of training ?
CNN : Can we stay for the night ?
COL : NO , these folks want to go home.
CNN : Col , we still have'nt seen anything
COL : If we start now , I can have you all back in Bagdad in time for lunch. You can enjoy MRE's with the troops.
CNN : Butt , Bagdad is right there , ( pointing ) we can walk it. Besides , we just leaft from there five minutes ago.
COL : Nonsense , you are all under my protection , let's all get on the helicopter. Besides , how would it look if everyone was seen over there , enjoying MRE's , with me standing right here ?