AIMLESSLY UNBALANCED

Franklin , Tennessee - BVD News , Detective Dixon of the Franklin Police Department arrested Jay Johnson last week , charging him with disorderly and drunken conduct.

Mayor Schroer , who is also President of The Citizens For Franklin Committee , had been complaining to both , Chief jackie and the Franklin Police Department , that someone was tipping cows and getting elephants drunk on Main Street , which prompted the police to put Detective Dixon on a walking patrol of Downtown Franklin.

After following a trail of empty whiskey bottles and tripping over tipped cows for 2 weeks , Det. Dixon came upon an unshaven and very drunk , Jay Johnson , sitting on the curb , counting empty beer cans while singing along with Pink Elephants.

Franklin Police Chief jackie finally stated , " Well some body had to arrest him. We can only cover up these things for just so long a period of time. I'm so sorry it had to be JJ. He was the driving force to put this department above the law and now that we are , he is now unfortunately , outside the law and our circle of Family and Friends , therefore an arrest had to be made , to show the people of this town , we are doing a job. "
Chief jackie finished by saying , " Dixon should get a medal for his heroic actions. He's a hero in my book and I'm going to put his picture up at the post office. "

Detective Dixon was unavailable for comment. The people of Franklin fondly remember that Jay Johnson was their former Leading Dictator Director for The City of Franklin , for too many long years.