Thursday, July 30, 2009
Franklin Police Get GPS'd

Franklin , Tennessee - BVD Bloggtographer , it's been reported , that The Franklin Police Department finally let go of some of their Greek Column funds , to allow GPS installation on their patrol cars. It seems the Dispatch Department never knew where their cars were , while doing shifty work and so , to take the guess work out of their shift work , GPS is now being added. " We will now know where all our cars are , at all times , while doing shifty work or not. " , stated the Franklin Police Dispatch Car Watch Program Departmental Supervisor
Maintenance garage guru and expert mechanic , Ernie ( pictured ) shows off one of the new GPS antennas before installation.
The South Returns
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Tongue Advice
Monday, July 27, 2009
Where's The Money Going ?
1. 22 Billion spent just on Welfare
2. 12 Billion for children going to school to learn English so they can fill out government freebie gimmie forms
3. 3 Billion for Medicaid Insurance
4. 4 Million a day for jail care
5. 2 Billion for food stamps ( needy veterans don't qualify for this and when they do , it's only 45$ after waiting 60 days )
6. 90 Billion for social programs
7. 45 Billion for mass deportation
8. President Obama wants to give 20 million illegals freebie health care while these same illegals send 45 Billion dollars to their out of country home , ( last year )
Meanwhile , The Pentagon gets 400 Billion every year , just for secret projects , that no one knows anything about. The same projects Gates states we don't need.
Our politicians continue to say , US American taxpayers , can not afford free health care for the country , while politicians , their family members and illegals , continue to receive free heath care at taxpayer expense.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
COMCAST Is Reeeally COMCASTIC Today
What I'm learning today are the COMCASTIC phone lines are fully COMCASTICALY staffed , BUTT , by the sales people. I've been switched 4 times to tech support only to find myself in cyberspace , where there's no air to breathe. After calling 4 times , that's spelled with a " F " , I decided to tell the world.
Scotty : Sorry Cap'tn , getting COMCAST sales is EZ , butt , getting COMCASTIC tech support ? Atz 'arrd.
Franklin Police Use of Electronic Harassment Device
Franklin Police has one of these , to use ass a tool. For example , in a hostage situation , this would be used to disrupt the kidnapper's thinking abilities , so they would make mistakes and therefore make it easier to take them down.
Of course , the down side to the police having this device is the simple fact that they enjoy using it on people they don't like , just for the Fracking fun of it all. Remember , the police do not have accountability.
Let's see what else it can do , shall we ?
Headaches are just Fracking awful. In a 6 month old infant , the blood vessels in their eyeballs will pulsate , while they scream bloody assed murder. And no , Franklin Police don't give a Frack ! In fact , they think it's funny.
Mood swings are typical. Anything and every little thing will piss a person off. High blood pressure and suicidal thoughts are also common. Reading is difficult and can be next to impossible to understand. Crank up the watts on this cute little toy and watch it kill people. Otherwise , a person will be doing things that they would not normally think about doing. Finger nails will also crack. Over an extended period of exposure , any injuries will take unusually longer to heal. Remember , this is a microwave , it's just radiation exposure.
Your pets will look sick all the time and the vet will be clueless ass to why
So called research has been performed routinely , on various animals for years. I was being interviewed during one such experiment , to observe if a cat can determine the direction , the device was located. ( The microwave sends a radiation signal in one direction only. This means , if you know what is happening to you , you will feel what direction the signal is coming from. ) After the test was over , the cat was shaking uncontrollably. ( I would call this torture instead of research , how about you ? This is the stuff , animal rights advocates get twisted over ) After seeing the test results , I told them I can not be a part of this. Meanwhile , over time , I heard stories about heating up their brains just to watch their skulls pop open. ( there were too many animals in inventory to feed/keep up ) I guess some people get excited at the sight of smoke coming out of something's ears. Well , think about it , a microwave heats up food does it not ? The brain is just another piece of sweet meat.
Now you might ask me , " How is it , I know about the pulsating eyeballs in infants. " Well , I've heard about it in baby monkeys and I've seen it on a baby human. The main thing about babies , is the simple fact , their little immature brains can not tolerate that radiation. In other words , their little brain probably feels like it's cooking. Remember , this thing is just like a microwave oven. Now , don't you feel better , knowing that Franklin Police have this toy in their inventory of fun and harassment games ? I know I sure do.
People have joked about this thing saying , " It's like committing the perfect crime , because it's like a light bulb. If it's on and no one sees it on , how does anyone know it was ever on ? "
I can tell you about it because I've seen it. And Det. Black of Franklin Police knows I have
p.s. - Vanderbilt threatened me in a horrible way , about what would happen if I ever , ever and I do mean EVER , mentioned this research to anyone. Since Franklin Police have this and are maliciously using it to harass people , I've decided to talk about it now , so come and get me.
Note - if you Google this subject , the pictures you see do not look like the same item owned by the police. Their toy has a tube coming out the front with the sheet metal formed around it and is painted black for stealth. A heavy weight tripod is also useful. This thing can also be mobile by mounting it inside an SUV ( with darker than normal , blacked out windows ) using the rail system.
Another note : Still don't understand this electronic harassment concept ? O Kay , here goes - remove the door from a microwave oven. Now , point the open oven at someone and turn the damn thing on. Effective range can be several hundred feet. ( This is the Sunday school version. )
Now do you understand why KoolAid left Franklin
Friday, July 24, 2009
Ebay Agrees To Hidden Fees
Ebay seller mommy_eoo134 immediately jumped onto the Ebay " hidden fee wagon " and currently hits her customers with a 50 cent hidden fee and she is already thinking about an additional 35 cent hidden surcharge to cover her costs of rewriting the invoices to show the hidden fee. " Hey , it takes time to hit all those little buttons on my keyboard. Ebay has yet to put an automatic feature on their auction site. Besides " , she added , " I'm worth more , butt , I had to toe the line somewhere and oh yeah , them Ebay fees were eating my ass AND my lunch , so what was I to do ? Hidden fees have saved my ass more than once , now , I'm here to tell ya. "
So there you have it folks , straight from the mule's ass. So , from now on , I recommend everyone thinking about bidding on Ebay , " ASK ABOUT HIDDEN CHARGES. " Before making any bid. Keep in mind , Ebay has yet to set limits on hidden fees , so watch out.
Ebay is well known for it's outrageous fees and surcharges , that have made Ebay the richest internet auction site on the planet.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
One Stormy Night in Franklin
BVD : Jerry , HEY ! ! , Jerry !
Jerry : What's wrong with you ? Calm down and catch your breath
BVD : Wheeeezing , pant , pant , gasp. I know their , gasp , secret. I'm telling you , their , gasp , secret is out now
Jerry : What are you talkin 'bout ? Here , have a hit on this , it'll help cool ya down
BVD : Gasp , wheez , pant , JJ and the police Chief , I know their little secret
Jerry : And that would be . , . , ?
BVD : Vampires , Jerry , they are all vampires. Yeah , the both of them
Jerry : Say what ?
BVD : Yeah , those Greek columns. They are actually Vampire crypts. I just saw the Chief and JJ slip out from the insides of those Justice Center Greek columns. That's where they sleep during the day.
Jerry : Have you been watching the SyFy channel again ?
BVD : Only on Saturday nights. Hey , look , I know what your thinking right now. Butt , let me ask you this. When was the last time you saw JJ or the Chief during the day and in the sunlight together ?
Jerry : Hmm. You know what ? They could have been just sleeping together. Those columns would make an excellent hide for such activities.
BVD : Hmmmmm. You're right. I hadn't thought of that one
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Those Damn Greek Columns
Greek columns represent Status and Wealth ( Franklin does have money to burn )
Greek columns represent Mastery over the Slaves ( from the Roman Empire to 1800s America )
Greek columns represent Mastery over the law to kick little people asses ( Franklin Police )
Greek columns represent Power over the little people ( Franklin government )
Greek columns represent Republican Party political support
Greek columns represent something Brentwood doesn't have
All that is needed now is to convert those columns into smoke stacks. Hmmm , perhaps maybe make those things stackable and make a Greek column stack high enough to pass political emissions testing. It seems Franklin can't pass or stack anything else these days
Obama's Health Plan
America's government - the economy seems to help those who have their party in office. For some reason , Bush's people enjoy running President Obama into the ground instead of helping. Hey , if you know the President is doing something wrong , then help out and point it out , don't shout it out , just help out. Of course , they can't do that. I applaud President Obama because he's doing something for this country and not lying about it.
Monday, July 20, 2009
The Ring Trilogy Dead End
Do you realize how short this movie would have been if they had just flown commercial on these flights. AND , a king would be crowned much sooner. AANNNNND , there would'nt have been much of a movie which would then allow for more party time in Hobbittville where affordable housing is everywhere
Friday, July 17, 2009
The Top Ten Reasons For Greek Column Sightseeing
1 - Greek columns are taller at Centennial High than Franklin High
2 - Greek columns are taller at the top and wider at the bottom , at The Franklin Police Department Center than The ( other ) Franklin Justice Center
3 - Greek columns give Franklinites an envious symbol of recognition and should not be confused with envious Brentwoodians
4 - Greek columns are scene symbolically on The Trolleys
5 - Greek columns are scene symbolically officially only on official Franklin police cars
6 - Greek columns give Brentwoodians an officially really good reason to be jealous of Franklinites ( HEY , they can't touch these , they are ours : )
7 - Greek columns put The only City of Franklin on The Tennessean Column Map
8 - Greek columns now come in 10 official kid style paper cut out toys at Steak and Shake ( so get on over and be the first to collect all 10 of them , official Franklin Trolley Tours Welcome )
9 - Greek columns are the official safe sites used only by the wealthy ( because they are the only people in Franklin with enough wealth to build them and fill them with wealth. Remember to have your camera ready ass you never know who you will see visiting their monetary safe column )
10 - Remember , only official Greek columns ( with the official Franklin blue label ) can officially represent Downtown Historic Franklin and not The Historic Downtown Franklin. ( these are easily confused )
11 - aaaaaaaaaaaaand coming soon to a soccer field near you ,
Note : it's pronounced column , not colon.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
America's Changing Direction
Franklin , Tennessee - ( because of my family being so disgustedly mistreated recently , I'm now talking about this ) Once upon a time , I over heard a conversation at my former employer. Here's what I remember : ( the military has UAVs , which stands for Unmanned Aerial Vehicle ) one version of this thing ( used by THE MARINES ) , comes in it's own backpack. Put a few parts together and you've got a flying airplane , now , put a camera on board and go find the enemy/target. With this toy plane is a computer , to program the flight path. GPS comes on board using a satellite link , which also enables this to send live pics to both the user and to someone at The Pentagon.
Well , the discussion was about exploring possibilities to make this UAV package smaller and lighter for the soldier in the field. To accomplish this feat , it was decided to use a helmet mounted , eye controllable , " keyboard ". It weighs less than a pound and has a flip down eye screen. The eyeball moves a cursor to program the UAV. ( Currently , quads use a similar system to help them live better , " quality lives " in a wheelchair ) Somewhere in the conversation , the idea of using implants came into the discussion.
Why ? Because the concern over this new change of doing things in the battle field was having someone compromise the mission or possibly make their own personal agenda while using this thing. Soooo , the card idea was explored. Research would be needed , to explore medical procedures and to implement , implant card reception. This way , the soldier can be programed any where and out of sight , The Pentagon deemed necessary. Some how , some where , the original UAV discussion , had dropped out of the conversation and the idea of having an elite special forces , with a card in their brains became the plan of the day.
Everyone was getting very excited , with all of this talk about programming their very own , elite killer soldiers , when the question suddenly came up , " Can this card technology be used on the general population ? " ( that's you and me , they are referring too , do you understand )
Soooo , how do you feel about this idea ? Hmmmm . What I would like to know is why The Pentagon would be asking such questions in the first place. I mean , just because they get 400 Billion dollars a year , to spend just on " Black Projects " , why are they talking about such ideas ? Is The Pentagon making future decisions for " US " now ?
That conversation took place over 10 years ago.
Note : I was horribly threatened at Vanderbilt , about what would happen to my family and me , if I ever mention this to anyone. Well , I don't care any more. Let your family cook under a microwave for a while and let's see how you feel about it.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Why Alaska Lost Thier Governor
Franklin , Tennessee - it's truly amazing how naive and / or ignorant , the American people are. Palin left office because she knows about the GOP secret meetings about starting up a new social style government.
In the 200+ years , THE CONSTITUTION of THE UNITED STATES has never been used. Therefore , why have it standing in the way of government ? Do you remember President Daddy Bush speeching about a New World Order ? It's coming and Palin wants in on the ground floor.
If you don't believe me , go ask your GOP rep about the new government in the making. It's happening right now ass you read this. Can you imagine what America would be like today , if THE CONSTITUTION was used , by the people ? Let's take a look here :
Americans would have free health care
Politicians would do their job instead of doing what they want to do for themselves
Government would do as the people said do , not the people doing what the government says do
NASA would have a manned presence on Mars
Gas would be 39 cents a gallon
There would be no tax on tea
America would not be TRILLION$ in debt
Now do you have a hint ass to why Franklin Police act the way they do ?
Thursday, July 09, 2009
Confiscating The Bible
Franklin , Tennessee - a concerned Bob Timmerman , wrote The Tennessean about Big Government confiscating everyone's Bible. I four one , don't see it happening and here's why. I'm only 50 years old. That's 1/2 of a century. ( or 50/100 century , for those with an educated degree from Vanderbilt ) Going backwards thru time itself , I can count 14 revised versions of The Bible and that does not include the " Blue Jean " version from LEVI , complete with hip pocket and real brass brads.
Here's my point - we are taught and we are told , The Bible is God's word. Sooooo , why is it , that man revises what The Bible says ? Who are we mortal men thinking we are , by changing what God has said ? The answer is simple " politics ". The Bible gets changed in accordance with the political atmosphere of the moment. In 50 years , changing The Bible 14 times shows a lot of political primate climate change.
Soooo , Mr. Timmerman , I really don't for see anything to worry about , until that is , the political climate gets primate enough to say for you to worry ( and I don't for see that happening in my life time ) , simply because they will merely change The Bible again and again and they'll even do it again , until politics getz it right. You see , using religion is just one avenue for politics to rule the roost while proving their popular acceptance.
Therefore , go forth and find The Bible version revision , you feel politically comfortably stable with and enjoy it in bed. Your rewards will be many times simplified , multiplied and fruitful , while politicians rest easy for another night
Another ISS Sighting

Franklin , Tennessee - if you missed it , ( again ) well that's your fault ( again ). WSMV said last night that ISS was on track to fly over Franklin ( again ). Despite the cloud cover , I was a little pessimistic , butt I hung in there and hoped , just the same.
Around 2020 , I checked on Lizard Tail and sure enough , ISS was headed this a - way and by 2025 , most of the clouds had gone to bed.
Although the Lizard Tail track was wrong , ISS was right on time , floating effortlessly across the sky , like it was attached to some kind of invisible thread , right over Franklin. ISS was clearly visible from horizon to horizon.
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
ISS Sighting
Well , how about half an excellent opportunity sky ? Just when it looked like the clouds were not going to co operate , during the final minute count down , the clouds suddenly parted and right on cue , out popped ISS , on it's Eastwardly trajectory to nowhere , aimlessly floating along , right above Franklin. The sighting couldn't get any better than last night.
Note : If you saw the other bright object moving southwards , seconds before ISS appeared , well then , that was not ISS. It was a satellite , but I don't know which one. Being on a southward orbit and being so bright , I would guess it's a spy type. And no , I'm not talking about the full moon either.
New Blog In Town
The click link is on the side people.
Go for it or forever shut up.
Monday, July 06, 2009
Are You Good Enough ?
Sooooo , if you think you've got what it takes , to be a Franklin Police Officer , here's the shortened list of the critically accredited acceptable credential limits questionaire ( just ask at the front desk for " The Cackle Test " ) you will need to succeed , once inside the Franklin Police Department :
Answer each question with a " Yes " or " No ". Only one answer per question allowed
Did your father breast feed you
Do you obey seat belt laws
Do you text while driving
Do you text while drinking
Do you text while having sex
Do you kiss ass to get ahead
Do you enjoy hurting people
Do you steal candy from children
Do you despise American Veterans
Do you enjoy making harassing phone calls
Do you enjoy having under age sex partners
Do you enjoy recreational drugs with your friends
Do you enjoy smoking something other than tobacco
Do your real friends not speak to you ( with good reason )
Ass a child , did your parents ignore you ( with good reason )
Do you have sticky fingers from Masturbating or are your fingers just normally sticky
Are you a Brown Nosier ( if you don't sport a Brown ring around your neck before the application process begins , don't worry , you will have a nice shiny one upon completion of an accepted and departmentally accredited training curriculum
Are you a compulsive thief
Are you a back stabber
Are you potty trained
Are you a liar
Cliff Notes : You may not change any answer , please don't ask to do so. Erasing IS NOT allowed on any electronic form. If you answer " No " to anything above , you could end your law enforcement career right then and there , along with any chance of ever being hired. Butt , if you think you screwed up an answer AND you still want in , don't worry. Just be happy and quietly let the examiner know ( slip the man a 20$ ) , that you are trainable and capable of learning something new.
Keep in mind , in addition to the above test , you must also pass two electronically digitized administered tests : The CALEA accredited adaptability and acceptability compliance pre-test and the departmental non-acceptability polygraph test for proving lack of non-compliance ( part B only ) , to factually confirm you meet or exceed all accepted and acceptable , credibility for non-accredited and/or/with all pre-meditative ( includes part A.1c ) , critical and qualitative pre-hiring requirements. ( Note : parts C w/B.1101 and D.a3b w/ q.091 - a , are now required by law by Congress. Be prepared to stay at least 8 hours )
Butt don't worry , the machine is broken and has'nt been fixed in years.
Saturday, July 04, 2009
That Old Shoebox
Chief jackie : sniff , sniff and sniffs some more. Ahhhh yessssss , this sure brings back the memories ( wiping away the tears )
Black : C'mon Chief , stop crying
jackie : I can't help it. This shoebox brings back the memories. What have you found in it so far
Black : Well , let's see. Here's a video player. Some Paula Dean pics. Hmm , looks like butter wrappers. Yuck , this box smells baaaaad. What's the hole in the side for ?
jackie : Hmmmm hmmmmm. C'mon. Your telling me , you don't know what this is ? It's JJ's fun box. That's what it is ( giggling ) Yeeaaaaaaaaaah , , , , , , , , fun box :)
Black : Fun box ?
jackie : Yeah. Oh c'mon detective , you know , a doo-doo box. ( smiles with a wink at the him ) It's an adulterary activity box
Black : An adulterary whaaaat ? Hmmmmph. I still don't get it. O K , well , let's see if the video player still works
Black : Eeeeeeeew , YUCK ! What is this sticky stuff ? ( shows the Chief the sticky stuff on his fingers ) A pecker trail ?
jackie : Hey , I'll take it if you don't want it
Friday, July 03, 2009
Friends Of the Police
If you get pulled over for DUI by Franklin Police , just ask the officer if they have ever let someone off before. When you don't get an answer , politely ask for the same courtesy. If you still go to jail , it means you will also go to court. Tell the judge politely , Franklin laws are for everyone , not just for someone and your arresting officer has let other people go and you would like the same treatment. For those who think I'm making this up , ask Don Young.
I'll bet you thought FOP stood for Fraternity of Police , did'nt you ?
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Homeland Security Hits Pay Dirt
BVD : Sir , how did you know there was money in there ( watching money pouring out , from a hole in a column )
Ray : We did'nt. However , satellite imagery clearly showed US , that something was indeed inside these " hollow " columns , giving US the impression , that Franklin Police may be preparing for WW III. I mean , just look at these columns , would you ? They are after all , large enough to house the latest , state of the art missiles from Korea or even Iran and these columns would make excellent , covert missile silos. I mean , just look at these things would ya ? These are the largest Greek columns I've ever seen. Who would have thought that these columns might be used to hide a missile in plain public sight ? Soooooo , we decided to come on over and have a look , you know what I mean ?
BVD : Yes sir , I know what you mean
Ray : Good. I see we are on the same page. ( a loud bang startles everyone to attention ) Damn it Mike , how many times have I got to remind you to shout it out before you do that ?
Mike : Oh , hi Ray , giggling , did'nt see you standing over there :) giggles some more ( a loud chinking sound starts coming from the column ass a river of coins hits the concrete )
BVD : Woooooooooow , you mean there's money in that one too ?
Ray : Sure looks like it , don't it ( looks on dumb founded , as money flows out from the second column ) I've never seen anything like this before.
BVD : Oh my Lord. Are all of these columns full of money ?
Ray : Well , I don't know yet , butt we are sure gonna find out. Satellite imagery shows , that every one of these columns , are full of something
Everyone is suddenly shocked and in awe , ass Jay Johnson steps out of a limo from nowhere , escorted by his Franklin police department with lots of sporting guns , Nazi boots on motorcycles , lights , sirens , spotlights panning about , people dressed in black and wearing dark sunglasses , armored vehicles with gun barrels in every port , a helicopter above with searchlights panning across the ground and lots and lots of more sporting guns , blindingly reflecting the sunlight.
Jay Johnson : O Kay everyone ! Stand back from there. I'm in charge now. ( looks at the money on the ground and starts pulling his hair out ass the pile of money continues growing ass if reaching for the sky ) My MONEEEEEEY ! AAAAAAAAAAH ! ! ! ! MY MONEY ! ! ! ! ! Oh my God ! ! ! ! ! What are you people doing to my money ?
BVD : Your money ? What makes this mess , your money ?
Jay J0hnson : What do you mean ? It's mine alright , I put it there for safe keeping. Yeah , it's mine all right , now you just stand back from it ya hear ? It's MINE ! ! ! ! !
Ray : Well , it's mine now. ( steps up face to face with Jay Johnson ) It's against the law to hide money in a Greek column :)
Jay Johnson : What do you mean , it's against the law ? Don't you know who I am ?
Ray : No and I don't really care. This money is now impounded. In other words , it's all mine right NOW !
Jay : Well , You will care to know who I am , after I have your stupid ass arrested. Chief ? Now where'd he go this time ? Why does that little fat fart of a bald headed bastard boy always disappear , when I need him the most. Hey Chief jackie , GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE and arrest this guy for me. He's trying to steal our money
Chief jackie : Our money ? ( looks on dumb founded ) You've never said it was " our's " before
Jay : Oh well , heh , heh , heh. Just an over sight my friend , heh , heh , heh , just an over sight , now arrest his ass. GOT THAT ?
Chief jackie : I can't boss. This guy is Homeland Security
Jay : What ? Well-ll-lll , this is Franklin , thank you very much and Damn it all to Hell ! I own this Fucked up one horse of a little town and that means I own everyone and everything in it and that means I own you too. I've spent my life , Fucking everyone to get this far and I'm not about to fall backwards. Now then , if you can't arrest him , then shoot him.
Chief jackie : I can't shoot him , boss. That would be against the law. Besides , I don't have a gun , remember ? I can't get a permit.
JJ : WHAT DO YOU MEAN AGAINST THE LAW ? I AM THE LAW IN THIS TOWN DAMN IT , DAMN IT , DAMN IT ALL TO HELL , I AM THE LAW ! ( his face is all purplely and about to burst ) DO ASS I SAY and DO IT NOW !
Chief jackie : I , I , I , can't boss. He out ranks me
Jay Johnson : Heee what ?
Chief jackie : He out ranks me. I can't arrest him
Jay Johnson : Oh ? What is he ? Some kind of an associate path ? Well , no problem. You are now hereby promoted to the rank of " High Enough " to arrest his ass. ( with those words , fighter jets suddenly fly over with the Screaming Eagles appearing from out of the clouds , screaming " Death From Above ". On the ground , from Ft. Knox , The MARINES with their Abrams , surround the situation )
Ray : Those would be mine. ( smiling arrogantly ) Any questions ?
Chief jackie : ( looks at JJ like it's the last time they will ever be together again ) If only you had allowed me to order that missile from China
Jay Johnson : Hmm , whaaaat ? Did'nt I tell you ?
Chief jackie : Tell me what ?
Jay Johnson : ( quietly whispers ) The fourth column , it's in the fourth column.
Chief jackie : ( his eyes aglow with love and affection for his boss ) Oh wooooooow. You do have the launch codes , right ? ( talking quietly )
Jay Johnson : Launch codes ? What's that ?
